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You are the master of your own decisions. You are in the position of consciously deciding against urges and you have probably done this several times before. Have you ever had the impression that the urge to act on your sexual fantasies related to children gets stronger when you are in an otherwise aroused emotional state like excited, curious, angry, lonely or sad? Have you ever had the impression that the urge to act on your sexual fantasies related to children gets stronger when you are in certain situations, such as when you are alone or passing by a playground?
What influences your decision? In which moments is it harder and when is it easier to stay strong?
Personal triggers for problematic behaviors, like CSAM use, are specific situations, emotions, thoughts, or patterns that can cause you to engage in that behavior. Identifying and understanding your personal triggers is crucial for breaking the cycle of ending up engaging in harmful behavior, as it allows you to consciously intervene before it occurs. Personal triggers vary greatly from person to person, but there are common categories and strategies you can use to identify your own.
Emotions are powerful triggers for behavior. Both unpleasant and pleasant emotions can increase the impulses to get (sexually) active.
By recognizing how you feel and what your emotional patterns are, you can start to see how certain feelings push you toward the behavior. Identifying emotional triggers for sexual behavior involves self-awareness and observation. Here are some ways to recognize them in yourself:
Certain places or situations might increase the likelihood of engaging in sexual behavior. It doesn’t necessarily directly trigger the behavior but can also happen hours or days later.
This could include:
Your thoughts and beliefs are powerful tools for changing your behavior. When you change how you think, your feelings and actions can change too. With regular practice, positive thinking can help you deal with urges more easily and support long-term change.
Some thoughts or beliefs can act as triggers or increase the desire to cope with emotions in certain ways. These thoughts can strongly influence you—either pushing you toward looking at sexual images or seeking contact with children, or helping you resist those urges.
Here are some examples:
When you feel the urge to engage in any problematic sexual behavior, note the specific thoughts running through your head. These could be thoughts like “I need to relax,” or “I can’t handle this stress anymore” but also something completely different.
Examine whether these thoughts are leading you to justify the behavior or directly engage in the activity. Identifying these rationalizations and thought patterns can help you challenge them in the future, consciously setting other thoughts against them and leading you to react differently e.g. masturbating with fantasies but avoiding sexual abuse material.
How Thoughts and Beliefs Can Strengthen Resistance to Harmful Behavior:
Our thoughts shape your emotions and actions. By shifting your mindset, you can strengthen your ability to resist harmful behaviors and create positive emotional states.
Here’s how:
Certain states of your body, like feeling fatigued, restless, overly stimulated or aroused can be triggers.
For example:
Identifying personal triggers is a key step in breaking free from unwanted sexual behaviors like CSAM use. By understanding the factors that contribute to triggering the behavior, you can begin to develop healthier coping mechanisms. Reflection, journaling and mindfulness can help you pinpoint these triggers, which then allows you to take proactive steps such as creating alternative thoughts to manage or eliminate them.